Goodbye-The Biggest Oxymoron

"Never say good-bye because good-bye means going away, and going away means forgetting."

 – Peter Pan

Peter Pan and me are soul mates  He summarized my fear of goodbyes in one sentence. I don't like forgetting and more than that...I don't like being forgotten  Goodbyes for me are like peeling back sidewalk. It just doesn't happen without something, most of the time my emotional stability, cracking into pieces. 

Vivid and deep I know, but the point is I have never been good at goodbyes. I have never understood why the word "good" is right next to "bye." One of the biggest oxymoron's in the English dictionary if I were being honest. Which I am.

Today is my last day at The Apparel Group. I thought this day would be easy.

I thought wrong.

I find myself thinking back to all the things I have done while working here. I traveled to New York. I traveled to Washington D.C. I visited my first country outside of the U.S., Israel. I graduated college. I experienced my firsts (and hopefully last) hurricane and earthquake. And most importantly...

I lived in New York City. 

There it is. I lived in the Big Apple. The place I had dreamed about since I was in 7th grade. The place I used to brag to my teammates about and tell them all about how I would live there while dribbling in basketball practice in Coahoma TX. The middle of no-where West Texas. This girl lived in the most popular city in the world. It's a miracle. 

It was my dream and it became my reality. 

I can't explain to you the MASSIVE moments of failure that I went through in the last 17 months; BUT I also can't explain the growth that happened through those moments of failure. I grew. I was challenged. I was hurt, and I overcame. 

So today, as I sit here in this chair for the last time I am overwhelmed, but not overcome. I see the light shining. I feel the peace wash over me. I know what I am doing is God's will. I know what I have done was His will. I say goodbye, but this goodbye I have to say is one of the few that actually can make this word not so much an oxymoron. 

It has been good and it is time to say bye. 

I say goodbye to the workplace that has become like home and the people that have become like family.

 I let go of the memories that haunted me and I hold onto the experiences that have shaped me. 

I look forward to the milestones of joy and pray for the strength to withstand the goodbyes ahead. 

Not all will be "good" goodbyes...so I walk away with my head held high and thank God for this one and let go and say...

Goodbye The Apparel Group. 

and

Hello Splash Media. 

"This is not the end. This is not even the beginning of the end. It is, instead, the end of the beginning"

– Winston Churchill